I was introduced to the comedian Steven Wright by Jared Gillins a while ago. I got hooked on his CD “I Have a Pony.” It was funny and definitely worth listening too.
For Christmas my sister and brother-in-law got me Wright’s new CD “I Still Have a Pony.” I found it as enjoyable as the original, and recommend it to anyone looking for quality comedy. It is in his usual deadpan style with crazy one liners and bizarre stories. Here are some key quotes:
When I was a little kid I wished the first word I ever said was the word quote so right before I died I could say unquote.
You know the earth is bipolar.
You ever notice when a house burns down the only thing left standing is the fireplace and the chimney? How’s that for evidence?
What did Jesus ever do for Santa Claus on his birthday?
My nephew has HDADD - High Definition Attention Deficit Disorder. He can barely pay attention but when he does it’s unbelievably clear.
So I’ve been emailing my answering machine which has been sending faxes to my cellular subconscious which has call waiting so in case I’m thinking about something else I can get back to myself later.
…my mind is skipping around and I’m wondering how my life would have been different had I been born one day earlier and then I’m thinking maybe it wouldn’t have been different other than I would have asked that question yesterday.
I’m addicted to placebos. I could quit but it wouldn’t matter.
A friend of mine has a trophy wife but apparently it wasn’t first place.
So I’m driving down the highway and there’s a guy hitchhiking, he’s holding a sign that says heaven. So I hit him.
Here’s an interview with Steven Wright.